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Bar Room Dirty Jokes is our editors picks of popular jokes heard around local bars, pubs, disco clubs, dives and other popular drinking establishments the world over compiled one this one page for your convenience.
Adult Humor and other adult content can be found within these pages. You must 18 years of age or older to read and deliver these jokes to friends and or family.
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Your Ultimate Listings of Sleezy Bar Room Jokes!
Every adult bar room joke ever told is right here!
Q: What did one alligator say to the other?
A: Airplane food sucks!
Q: Last words of a frontier man to his son right before they are stampeded by Buffalo.
A: "Bison"
Q: What is the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottish Man?
A: The Rolling Stones Said ,"Hey you get off of my cloud". And the Scottish man said "Hey McCloud get off of my ewe".
Q: What is the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
A: Snowballs!
Q. What is long and green and smells like pig?
A. Kermits finger.
Q: What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
A: The location of the dirt bag.
Q: What's a wicker box?
A: Thats what Elmer Fudd wanted to do to Madona.
Q :Why did Liberachi play the piano?
A: Because he sucked on the organ.
Q: Why did Lisa Marie want a divorce from Michael Jackson?
A: He was spending too much time with the boys.
Q: Why do all Texans have 2" balls?
A: So they can tow each others trailers.
Q: Why does a pilgram's pants always fall down?
A: Because they wear their belt buckle on their hat.
Q: Why do eskimos was their clothes in tide?
A: 'cause it's to cold out tide.
Q: What do you get when you cross an insomniac, a dyslexic, and an agnostic?
A: Some one who sets up all night wondering if there really is a dog.
Q: What is the difference between a pig and a fox?
A: About a 12 pack.
Q: What is the difference between a Hobo and a Homo?
A: A Hobo is lonely, and a Homo has friends up the ass.
Q:What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver?
A: A bad golfer goes, WHACK! "Damn." A bad skydiver goes, "Damn." WHACK!
Q: What is grey and comes in quarts?
A: An elephant.
Q: What's the difference between Rush Limbaugh and the Hindenberg?
A: One is a over inflated nazi gas bag and the other is a dirigible.
Q: Why does it take three Women with PMS to change just one lightbulb?
A: IT JUST DOES!! OK?!?!?
Q: How do you keep sexual deviants from committing homosexual acts?
A: Put them all in straight jackets.
Q: WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A JACK-ASS AND AN ONION?
A: SOME ASS THAT WILL BRING TEARS TO YOUR EYES.
Q: What does a 500 pound parrot say?
A: Polly wants a craker - NOW!
Q: What's the state bird of Kentucky?
A: The housefly
Q: What did they say to the woman who won the beauty pageant in Kentucky?
A: "Smile and show your tooth"
Q: What do you have when there are 2 rows of 16 Kentuckians?
A: A full set of teeth
Q: Why did the sheep jump off the cliff?
A: He didn't see the 'ewe' turn.
Q: Who was the worst golfplayer of all time?
A: Adolf Hitler, he never got out of the bunker.
Q: Where does a one armed man shop?
A: At a second hand store!
Q: Why did God make only one Yogi Bear?
Q: Because when he tried to make a second one he made a Boo-Boo.
Q: What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday?
A: "Thanks, I'll never part with it!"
Q: Why do golfers always bring two pairs of pants?
A: In case they get a 'hole in one'.
Q: What's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?
A: A Doberman.
Q: What has four wheels and flies?
A: A garbage truck.
Q: How many of Kelly's customers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two. One to hold the lightbulb, and one to drink 'til the room spins.
Q How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but the light bulb has to WANT to change.
Q: How many months have 28 days in them?
A: 12 they all have at least 28 days.
Q: Why did the blond climb the glass wall?
A: To see what was on the other side.
Q: What did the banana tree say to the coconut tree when he heard a hurricane was coming.
A: You better hang on to your nuts because your about to get a hell of a blow job!
Q: Hear about the Polish milk carton? It has a childproof lid.
Q: Where is Saddam Hussein going to end up?
A: On scud row!
Q: What two things in the air can make a woman pregnant?
A: Her legs.
Q: How do you know when a blonde's been at the computer?
A: There's rat poison on the mousepad.
Q: Why did the man, trying to kill himself, tie a rope around his waist?
A: Because it got too tight around his neck.
Q: How far can a person walk into a forest?
A: Only halfway, because after that he would then be walking out of the forest.
Q: If a tree falls in the forest with noone to hear it then who will notify the next of kindling?
Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes?
A: No eye-deer.
Q: What do you call a cow with no legs?
A: Ground beef!
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